“Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.”
Listening, Kindness, and My Father’s Legacy
I’ve been thinking about being kind vs being nice.
Kindness is more than being pleasant — it’s presence, effort, and care.
So, I did what we do, I Googled it. I think I already kind of knew there was a slight difference. Kind is more of a deeper level of compassion and genuine care and action to help others. More of an effort.
While nice is being polite or pleasant “keeping the peace”
Being nice is easy. Being kind takes heart.
I used to tell my kids when they were little, ‘You don’t have to play with someone you don’t like, but you can’t be mean to them.” You are not going to like everyone you meet or work with, but be nice, and be kind when you can. Make the extra effort, it not only helps them, it helps you. The more kindness you put out, the world gets a bit better.
I made a decal when my dad died. It says “Be a nice human”. I gave them out at his memorial service. I put one on my car and laptop. I know a lot of people that took one did the same. It was my way to honor him. He lived his life with humility, compassion, kindness and grace. He was an example of how to appreciate the people around you.
He was a nice person. But now when I think of it, he was a kind person.
Dad was always there to listen and give some advice. Not always what you wanted to hear, but good advice. I think that was the thing. He listened. He wasn’t the loudest person in the room, he didn’t always have to get his point across or his side of the story out. But when he had something to say, you probably needed to be listening.
I probably don’t listen as I should. I interrupt, too much. Ask my poor husband…
I’m working on it.
Listening. Not always having to say something. Listening, not with the intent of responding.
Some quiet examples, the small actions, and the effort to really listen.
Here are some things to try, to get into a better mindset:
- Smile at people.
- Say ‘good morning, hi.’
- When you ask someone how they are, maybe phrase it differently to get more of a response than ‘fine’ And if you ask, be ready to listen. And be genuinely interested.
- Give your people, the ones you are the closest to, a hug. I know some people are not huggers. But if you feel comfortable give a hug.
So I think that in addition to all the other stuff I’m contemplating, being kind is another thing to work on.
I don’t always make the effort to be kind. I guess I’m a nice person, working on being kind. And listening.
Be kind to yourself.
Kindness starts with connection.
Feel free to say hello, share a thought, or ask a question. I’m always open to meaningful conversation.