“Be like water making its way through cracks.
Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it.”
Watching the Water
I’ve spent a lot of time trying to move the rocks in the river.
I remember when I was young standing by a stream or a small flow of water, picking up a rock and dropping it into the current just to see what would happen.
The water doesn’t stop. It doesn’t argue with the rock. It simply moves around it, swirling, adapting, continuing on its way.
Watching that, it’s easy to see something simple and true: the current keeps moving.
Trying to Keep the Current Smooth
Over the years I’ve realized that I have a tendency to try to fix things.
I didn’t think of it that way at the time. I just thought I was helping — smoothing situations out, anticipating tension before it even happened, trying to prevent conflict and keep things flowing smoothly.
Somewhere along the way, though, I started thinking it was my job to move the rocks.
Not My Rocks
But all this smoothing, anticipating and trying to manage the flow is exhausing.
Trying to prevent the water from meeting resistance.
And rocks are heavy after a while.
Especially when you start picking up rocks that were never yours to move.
The Shift
Rivers don’t work that way.
A river doesn’t stop when it meets a rock. It doesn’t try to rearrange the landscape. It simply moves around it, over it, sometimes slowly through it. The current keeps flowing.
Thinking about the river started to shift something in my perspective.
I’m Not in Charge of the River
At first I imagined myself standing on the shore, watching the river and trying to manage the flow — figuring out which rocks to move, anticipating what might happen next.
Then I realized something else.
I’m not standing outside the river at all.
I’m in it.
And slowly a small aha moment appeared.
I’m not just in the river.
I’m part of the river.
The current, the movement, the flow — we’re all part of it.
Leaving the Rocks Where They Are
If that’s true, then it isn’t my job to move the rocks.
Rocks are part of the river’s path. The current already knows how to move around them, over them, sometimes slowly through them. The river doesn’t need my help.
This realization brings both relief and a little tension, because letting go of the feeling that it’s my job feels strange.
I still catch myself trying to move the rocks sometimes.
But this realization helps me return to the current again and again — hopefully more often than not.
Life has its own current.
And I’m working on remembering to leave the rocks where they are…
unless it’s a really cool rock that might want to come home with me. 🙂
The river already knows how to flow.
Be Kind to Yourself and Trust the Current
This is the kind of conversation that grows.
What rocks might you be trying to move right now? Feel free to reach out and share.